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60+ Aziz Ansari Quotes Indian Comedian Quotes

Aziz Ansari Quotes :  Aziz Ansari Quotes is Indian Comedian he used to inspire people by their quotes, Aziz Ansari Quotes is famous all over the world. Today we share with you best collection of Aziz Ansari Quotes that might you inspire and show the best way to live life. I also personally fan of Aziz Ansari Quotes that why I decided to share with you. Aziz Ansari Quotes increase you boost your working power and their quotes help to remove stress. So that why I recommend to you to read Aziz Ansari Quotes and learn more about Life.

About Aziz Ansari Quotes “Aziz Ismail Ansari is an American actor, comedian, writer, director and producer. He is known for his role as Tom Haverford on the NBC series Parks and Recreation and as creator and star of the Netflix … Wikipedia

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Aziz Ansari Quotes

When I tour, it’s like, well, like a food tour as much as a comedy tour. I try to eat at all the weird places, the obscure barbecue joints, burger places. There are a few spots in L.A. that I’m obsessed with – one of them is the Taco Zone taco truck on Alvarado. There are secret off-menu items that are amazing.

Every single person, pretty much, is taught what they’re supposed to do: go to school, get a job, find someone to love, get married, have kids, raise the kids, and then die. Nobody questions that. What if you want to do something different?

Writing your own jokes, you just kind of keep working on something until you think it might work, and then you try it out and hope for the best.

Even in my stand-up, there’s a lot more positivity and enthusiasm rather than negative, I-hate-everything vibes.

I’m in a situation with this girl that’s as hopeless as overthrowing the Bush administration.

“When I bet on horses, I never lose. Why? I bet on all the horses.”
— Aziz Ansari

“When you meet someone you really like and connect with, I think that’s very special, and not to be taken for granted.”
— Aziz Ansari

“Oh, am I wearing an ascot? I didn’t notice.”
— Aziz Ansari

“The hardest part about rollerblading is telling your parents you’re gay.”
— Aziz Ansari

“I’m like an elephant, ok? If I walk into a room, it’s like, OK, he’s in there.”
— Aziz Ansari

“I have never taken the high road, but I tell other people to ’cause then there’s more room for me on the low road.”
— Aziz Ansari

“If you believe that men and women have equal rights, if someone asks if you’re feminist, you have to say yes because that is how words work.”

— Aziz Ansari

Aziz Ansari Quote: “One of the big things I miss about New York is not my friends so much; it’s Shake Shack, the burger place. I miss Shake Shack.” 1 0

“One of the big things I miss about New York is not my friends so much; it’s Shake Shack, the burger place. I miss Shake Shack.”
— Aziz Ansari

“I prefer being totally sober myself.”
— Aziz Ansari

“Others fear what the morrow may bring. I am afraid of what happened yesterday.”
— Aziz Ansari

feminist in the dictionary, it just means someone who believes men and women have equal rights…”
— Aziz Ansari

“She broke up with me. Didn’t really tell me why. Luckily when you’re the guy, you can just tell people she’s crazy. ‘Hey, Tom, I heard you and Lucy broke up.’ ‘Yeah, man. Turns out, she’s crazy.’ That’s what they always do on Entourage.”
— Aziz Ansari

“I like going out and I like being single, but a growing part of me would rather just stay home, cook food with someone I really like, and do nothing.”
— Aziz Ansari

“Fiddling knobs, touching keys, having fun with a full grown man.”
— Aziz Ansari

“I have no interest in art. Let me clarify – I have no interest in non-nude images.”
— Aziz Ansari

“Everyone steals. My favorite movie is Love Don’t Cost a Thing with Nick Cannon. Which is based on Can’t Buy Me Love, which is based on Kramer vs. Kramer, or something, which I think was Shakespeare.”
— Aziz Ansari

“I just think it’s sad that the main places in our culture that we designate to meet new people are bars and nightclubs…”
— Aziz Ansari

19. “The four sweetest words in the English language – ‘You wore me down.’”
— Aziz Ansari

“I’m so jealous of people who have crushes on people they go to school with, or work with. That’s such a blessing. You actually get to see them all the time and spend time with them.”
— Aziz Ansari

“One of my life goals is to be a best man. It’s a baller position. You get drunk, you make speeches, and you make love to the prettiest bridesmaid. Usually standing from behind.”
— Aziz Ansari

“My dad grew up basically in a hut in Taiwan without enough food to eat. And within one generation his son in America gets to do a comedy show about whatever he wants.”
— Aziz Ansari

“Oh, what’s this in my shoe? Red carpet insole. Everywhere I go, I’m walking on red carpet.”
— Aziz Ansari

“Instead of yelling your opinion, or telling people to shut up, or engaging in this clickbait-internet culture, have a dialogue with someone and ask people questions and listen to what they have to say.”
— Aziz Ansari

“At the risk bragging, one of the things I’m best at is riding coattails. Behind every successful man is me, smiling and taking partial credit.”
— Aziz Ansari

“I guess my music taste is pretty predictable: I like new indie rock stuff, older stuff.”
— Aziz Ansari

It’s all dangerously true. It’d be nice if something worked out for me, and then I’d have to get material out of that.

After you do a joke a few times, you have material that you know works. Although sometimes I have a joke that has worked a bunch of times and then one night it’ll flop. And that’s when I really take a hard look at myself and say: ‘Well, that crowd is obviously wrong. That crowd has absolutely no idea what it’s talking about.’

For the majority of the time, I may as well have been just a really tan white kid. You know, I may as well have just been, like, a fat kid.

You missed a crazy party dude. I woke up with glitter on my dick!

Nela – can you come and disinfect this please. I don’t want our customers complaining that our fruit tastes like New Zealanders

Sometimes you gotta work a little, so you can ball a lot.
Aziz Ansari

Aziz Ansari quote: I have no interest in art. Let me clarify — I have no…
I have no interest in art. Let me clarify — I have no interest in non-nude images.
Aziz Ansari

Regardless of your ethnicity or anything, if you do great work, people will notice and you’ll get hired.
Aziz Ansari

Zerts’ are what I call desserts. ‘Trée-trées’ are entrées. I call sandwiches ‘sammies,’ ‘sandoozles,’ or ‘Adam Sandlers.’ Air conditioners are ‘cool blasterz’ with a ‘z’ – I don’t know where that came from. I call cakes ‘big ol’ cookies.’ I call noodles ‘long-ass rice.’ Fried chicken is ‘fry-fry chicky-chick.’ Chicken parm is ‘chicky-chicky-parm-parm.’ Chicken cacciatore? ‘Chicky-cacc.’ I call eggs ‘pre-birds,’ or ‘future birds.’ Root beer is ‘super water.’ Tortillas are ‘bean blankets.’ And I call forks ‘food rakes.’
Aziz Ansari

I just didn’t want to be pigeonholed as an ‘ethnic comic’ or an ‘Asian comic.’ I just wanted to be on the same playing field as everyone else.
Aziz Ansari

Aziz Ansari quote: I’m an optimist – I feel like an amazing part of life is…
I’m an optimist – I feel like an amazing part of life is that at any moment.
Aziz Ansari

I spend so much time on the Internet…I feel like I’m a million pages into the worst book ever, and I’m never going to stop reading.
Aziz Ansari

I like going out and I like being single, but a growing part…
I like going out and I like being single, but a growing part of me would rather just stay home, cook food with someone I really like, and do nothing.
Aziz Ansari

I have never taken the high road, but I tell other people to ’cause then there’s more room for me on the low road.
Aziz Ansari

Do you realize how much better the world would be if we all just treated each other the same way black dudes treat magicians?
Aziz Ansari

This is one of my favorite pick up strategies: I’m constantly giving women my keys. So far, none of them have shown up. Matter of time. And I’ve been robbed twice.
Aziz Ansari

Others fear what the morrow may bring. I am afraid of what happened yesterday.
Aziz Ansari

Instead of yelling your opinion, or telling people to shut up, or engaging in this clickbait-internet culture, have a dialogue with someone and ask people questions and listen to what they have to say.
Aziz Ansari

I went to a place recently I think is one of the most f**ked up places I’ve ever been to. I’m convinced this place is the epitome of American excess, of American greed. I’m talking about a place called Cold Stone Creamery. Whoa. If you have not been there, the basic gist of Cold Stone is that they take ice cream and then they just go ape sh*t with it.

The hardest part about rollerblading is telling your parents you’re gay.
Aziz Ansari

You’ve got to be pretty confident that you’re good. If I do a show and for whatever reason no one laughs, I’ll be like, ‘Wow, those people are weird’.
Aziz Ansari

One of the big things I miss about New York is not my friends so much; it’s Shake Shack, the burger place. I miss Shake Shack.
Aziz Ansari

Let’s have a moment of silence for all the chubby Asian dudes that are getting ‘Gangnam style!’ yelled at them by bros around the world.
Aziz Ansari

My dad grew up basically in a hut in Taiwan without enough food to eat. And within one generation his son in America gets to do a comedy show about whatever he wants.
Aziz Ansari

You’re a feminist if you go to a Jay Z and Beyoncé concert, and you’re not like, ‘Mmm, I feel like Beyoncé should get 23 percent less money than Jay Z’.
Aziz Ansari

Modern life. Where are we running? Sometimes what we want is not always where we are… Are we alone? Is the real winter inside our hearts? We are all struggling for definition in a world that resists our increase.
Aziz Ansari

When I walk around, sometimes people recognize me from things they’ve seen me in, TV or whatever. And they’d say, you know, stuff, and a lot of times, I wouldn’t hear what they’d said because I had headphones on. So, I kinda just go, ‘Cool, man. Glad you like the show.’ And I’d just keep walking. And this one guy said something to me one time, and I went, ‘Cool, man. Glad you like the show.’ And then right when I walked past him, I realized, ‘Oh, man, that guy didn’t say anything about the show.’ He went, ‘Hey, man, your fly’s down.’ And I went, ‘Cool, man. Glad you like the show. Glad you like seeing my d*ck pop out of my pants. Come back next week, you can see one of my balls.’

I’m not making this up — he goes ‘Now if your neighbor marries a box turtle, that doesn’t affect your everyday life. But that doesn’t mean it’s right.’ I think it’s pretty safe to assume that, at one point or another, Senator John Cornyn has thought about making love to a box turtle. I’m sorry, but that’s not the first animal you jump to when you’re writing that analogy.

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