Top 50 Groucho Marx Quotes

Groucho Marx Quotes : Groucho Marx is educator he used to inspire people by their quotes, Groucho Marx Quotes is famous all over the world. Today we share with you best collection of Groucho Marx Quotes that might you inspire and show the best way to live life.

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Groucho Marx dedicated whole life to their work and make more better life for people. Still lot of people follow Cher quotes.

About Groucho Marx Quotes “Julius Henry “Groucho” Marx was an American comedian, actor, writer, stage, film, radio, and television star. He is generally considered to have been a master of quick wit and one of America’s greatest comedians. He made 13 feature films as a team with his siblings the Marx Brothers, of whom he was the third-born. Wikipedia

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Groucho Marx Quotes

“Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.”
— Groucho Marx

“Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.”
— Groucho Marx

“If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.”
— Groucho Marx

Be open minded, but not so open minded that your brains fall out.
Groucho Marx

Groucho Marx quote: If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy…
If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.
Groucho Marx

I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.
Groucho Marx

[He] may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don’t let that fool you: he really is an idiot.
Groucho Marx

Groucho Marx quote: Those are my principles, and if you don’t like them… well, I have…
Those are my principles, and if you don’t like them… well, I have others.
Groucho Marx

Groucho Marx quote: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today…
I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.
Groucho Marx

I’m not a vegetarian, but I eat animals who are.
Groucho Marx

There’s only two things you can start without a plan: a riot and a family, for everything else you need a plan.
Groucho Marx

When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun.’
Groucho Marx

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
Groucho Marx

Middle age is when you go to bed at night and hope you feel better in the morning. Old age is when you go to bed at night and hope you wake up in the morning.
Groucho Marx

If you are not having fun you are doing something wrong.
Groucho Marx

I intend to live forever, or die trying.
Groucho Marx

What have future generations ever done for us?
Groucho Marx

Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
Groucho Marx

While money can’t buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.
Groucho Marx

I’d like to meet the person who invented sex and see what they’re working on now.
Groucho Marx

“A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.”
— Groucho Marx

“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”
— Groucho Marx

“I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.”
— Groucho Marx

“Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.”
— Groucho Marx

“I’m leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it’s not raining.”
— Groucho Marx

“I’ve got the brain of a four year old. I’ll bet he was glad to be rid of it.”
— Groucho Marx

“I remember the first time I had sex – I kept the receipt.”
— Groucho Marx

“Many years ago I chased a woman for almost two years, only to discover that her tastes were exactly like mine: we both were crazy about girls.”
— Groucho Marx

“A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.”
— Groucho Marx

“It’s hard to get ivory in Africa, but in Alabama the Tuscaloosa”
— Groucho Marx

“Go, and never darken my towels again”
— Groucho Marx

“Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.”
— Groucho Marx

“I wish to be cremated. One tenth of my ashes shall be given to my agent, as written in our contract.”
— Groucho Marx

“Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?”
— Groucho Marx

“All people are born alike – except Republicans and Democrats.”
— Groucho Marx

“When I invite a woman to dinner, I expect her to look at my face. That’s the price she has to pay.”
— Groucho Marx

“There’s one way to find out if a man is honest – ask him. If he says, ‘Yes,’ you know he is a crook.”
— Groucho Marx

“Before I speak, I have something important to say.”
— Groucho Marx

“In any relationship, the woman has control, the clever ones don’t let the men know.”
— Groucho Marx

“Don’t let the fear of the thorn keep you from the rose.”
— Groucho Marx

“Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman. Then if you can get the dog to go somewhere and read the book, I might have a little fun.”
— Groucho Marx

“Either he’s dead or my watch has stopped.”
— Groucho Marx

“Be open minded, but not so open minded that your brains fall out.”
— Groucho Marx

“If we had some eggs we could have eggs and ham, if we had some ham.”
— Groucho Marx

“My mother loved children – she would have given anything if I had been one.”
— Groucho Marx

“If income tax is the price you have to pay to keep the government on its feet, alimony is the price we have to pay for sweeping a woman off hers.”
— Groucho Marx

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Originally posted 2022-01-30 00:39:59.

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